Note From Cory: This is a guest post from Cami Lebovitz. She has served as a Spiritual Formation Pastor at 12Stone Church for the last 6 years. While Cami is a gifted and talented pastor, my favorite thing about her is that she is an incredible wife and mother to our daughter Nora. I am excited to have her share some thoughts on discerning the voice of God in the pace of everyday life. Enjoy!
Two years ago, Cory and I stowed away a special box. We would see it annually while unearthing Christmas decorations and anxiously awaited the day when we could open the package. We pictured a dreamy Christmas morning where we would finally assemble a bright yellow, shiny pedal car gifted to us for our daughter Nora as a “someday” present for her. This year as all the décor came out of the closet, we knew age three was the right time for our girl to finally open the big gift. She was elated to see the box and of course used her brown doe eyes to woo her daddy and Uncle Josh into assembling the car. After several frustrating hours just moments they had it assembled and ready to go for a drive.
Nora led me out to the cul-de-sac where I sat the car on the sidewalk and encouraged Nora to pedal. “One, two, one, two, Nora! Just keep pedaling to move forward, you can do it!” I’d encourage from well behind her. Each time her foot pressed into the pedal she would move a few feet forward and my heart would soar with excitement. A few strides in, steering and pedaling grew complicated, Nora would let her feet go and begin to slide backwards.
From the time, she was a fresh newborn in a hospital bassinet my daughter has feared the feeling that she is falling. So, my parent-coaching ensued and I worked to stay calm in encouraging her, “But Nora if you would just keep pedaling forward you wouldn’t slide backwards! Trust me enough to pedal so you won’t be hurt.” She continued to try and fail and the sun sunk into the winter sky. I watched my girl walk back to our house dejected as I hauled the pedal car behind her.
And then took place my favorite moment of the holidays. We sat in the driveway and I pulled her in and she looked at me defeated. “Nora, I know that was so hard. It wasn’t as much fun as you thought tonight. But I am so proud of you. You tried really hard to keep pedaling even when you were scared. Even if you fail a lot, I am so proud of you for trying when it’s hard.” Her face softened and she settled into me.
And then it was as if God shined the spotlight toward me. He reminded me that He does not sit on high looking at my life’s win-loss record like a fair-weather fan. The heart of the Father looks at the whole of who He’s making me to be and even when I fall flat on my face He is cheering me on. (Click to tweet) My God knows the truth of who I am and the holiness won in the fight of persevering defeated.
I am consistently overwhelmed by and never reaching the end of understanding His love for me. But I believe it’s what He has for you too. The truth is you could never fail too far from the love of God. (Click to tweet)